Kim Kardashian broke the internet! Did you hear?

Yes; sadly, Kim Kardashians epic booty broke the internet. May the information train rest in peace; this caboose just sent it off track. It is a miracle you’re able to read this, actually. Thanks a lot, Paper Magazine (and double K).

So, admittedly, I’ve watched a few episodes of Keeping up with the Kardashians. I think the last shows I watched catalogued the demise of Kim’s 72 day marriage. What a sad end to a fatally flawed relationship. What was her (second) husband’s name? Kris Humphrey? Did she marry him because his first name started with a K (her mom named all of her girls K names)? I bet her mom Kris insisted it was fate that her little Kimmie marry ‘Kris.’ The world may never know. Let’s say, for argument’s sake, that Kim married Kris because of her subconscious need to please her mother. It’s kind of a stretch, but stay with me.

Is it really a stretch? Remember that episode when Kris BEGS her daughter to do a photo shoot for playboy? Viewers cringed as her mother did everything short of submissively whining on her knees for the then twenty-something budding starlet to appear on the pages of a smut magazine; all the while, Kim insists that she is incredibly uncomfortable with the idea. She didn’t want to do it. And yet, Kris insists that Kim go through with the shoot. “Think of how wonderful it will be when you’re my age and you can look back to see how beautiful you were!”

Ehem.

And so, Kim goes through with the playboy opportunity. It seemed odd timing, as Kim put the Kardashian name on the radar after a sex tape between her and Ray J was released. Perhaps this was image management (I really AM innocent!), but then again, I wonder if Kim has been coached this way her entire life. ‘Take more off! More people will notice!’ I can almost hear her ‘momager’ now. When I think about this, I furrow my brow with simultaneous suspicion and disgust. Surely, a loving mother would never encourage her daughter to find her value simply in her naked body. After all, women have much more to offer than sex. And yet, I tend to believe that any mother who would beg their daughter to do a nude photo shoot have subconsciously encouraged this type of behavior all along.

Is Kim beautiful? Absolutely. Sexy? You bet. Is her booty enviable? Duh. This is not an attempt to suggest otherwise. I will contend, however, that the fact that I know her booty is enviable is inherently problematic.

You see, Kim Kardashian has a little girl.

There is a big part of me that believes Kim loves that little girl with all of her heart. Not JUST because little Nori has her own stylist whose sole job is to match mommy’s outfits. But because Kim is a mommy; she has always wanted to be a mommy. Little Nori is an answered prayer. And she is oh-so-cute.

But, perhaps I shouldn’t just focus on how adorable this little girl is. I have a hunch that when Kim was younger, her parents did the same. Who could blame them? She is a beautiful girl. But her beauty shouldn’t just be in her exotic persian features. As cliched as it may be, her beauty should be found within. Her worth was never in her beauty, after all. Her worth was found in the fact that she had been loved unconditionally before she was even in the world: just as little Nori was.

But, what happens if this precious baby North will see her gorgeous mommy baring her bottom for a magazine and think that is commonplace? What will happen if baby North doesn’t inherit her mom’s curves? What if she hates her body? What if she decides the only way to love her body is to bare it for the world to see?

Perhaps Kim has accepted this as a part of having a little girl. Maybe when she saw the ultrasound revealing the little baby’s gender, she realized that one day that little girl will grow up to become a young woman, and that young woman will want to feel sexy and desired and envied. After all, that is what her mom has reinforced nearly her entire young adult life.

It is OK to want to feel desired. That is totally natural. It is NOT OK that you feel you have to exploit yourself to do so. It is NOT OK that your mom suggested that you find worth in exposing your naked body. Your sex is valuable; I’m sure you’ll teach your daughter that. Your husband loves you and values you more than you know; I am sure you’ll beseech North to find a husband who loves her just as much. Beyond that, there is someone who has loved you before you were even a thought…but that is a topic for another day.

The problem with breaking the internet isn’t simply the fact that you’ve bared your perfectly rounded and perfectly enviable bottom, double K. The problem is that, instead of breaking the internet, perhaps you should focus on breaking the cycle.

What do you think about Kim breaking the internet?